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How Do You Like Your Eggs?

15 Aug

As is often the case, this post was inspired by a conversation the MDM had with some of her dear fellow maidens. Ladies, you know who you are – thank you for providing a constant source of inspiration for the MDM. This blog just wouldn’t be the same without you.

Said conversation involved a discussion around the concept of putting all one’s eggs in one basket, metaphorically speaking. It was relayed to one of the MDM’s dear friends that the male approach to potential romantic attachments avoids putting said “eggs” in only one basket until the male genuinely believes that one particular basket and associated egg is worth pursuing. Some more wordly types may describe this as typical “player” behaviour, however it is important to note that this could not be further from the truth where many a Godly, Eligible Bachelor (GEB) is concerned. Indeed, the typical GEB would rather admire different eggs in their uniquely packaged baskets rather than pursue several eggs at one time and thus cause heartache (or break an eggshell) to the parties involved.

No, dear readers, the GEB is not being a player by avoiding to put all his eggs in one basket, rather he waits until the appropriate time to pursue the maiden with whom he feels a genuine connection that goes beyond the outer appearance of the basket. Further to this, many GEB’s are carefully measuring their chance of success before even approaching a maiden they are interested in. After all, they don’t want to approach a basket to find that there is no handle with which to pick it up.

The female approach to potential suitors however, is vastly different. The female mind is prone to look at an egg, pick it up, crack the shell, decide which way to prepare it, and sit down to consume said egg (poached, scrambled, fried, boiled, omelette etc) before realising that there’s actually no one else sitting at her table for two. Yes, my fellow maidens, we have a distinctly feminine habit of letting our imaginations run positively wild when it comes to romantic relationships with a particular potential suitor. We have been known to practice conversations in our head, multiple times, imagining a plethora of scenarios between us and our chosen potential suitor that rarely, if ever come to pass. Indeed, we have been known to go to such extreme measures as practicing our new signature in case we ever get married to said potential suitor, and writing a list of future baby names, conveniently forgetting that we haven’t actually even been on a date with him at all. In reality, often we have not even spent the time getting to know said egg before our minds have us married off…

The moral to this story? Let’s not get ahead of ourselves as maidens. Just because eggs can be eaten at any meal of the day does not give us permission to run rampant around the kitchen of our imagination. Egg shells are, after all, rather fragile.

Dreadful Dates & Other Tragic Tales.

3 Aug

In recent months the MDM has been blessed to catch up with several of her beloved friends who also happen to be in the single season of their lives. Whilst eligible bachelors, potential suitors and the male gender in general do not account for the majority of conversation, these topics do inevitably enter the dialogue between the MDM and her dear friends. An aside note at this point, dear readers: other topics of such conversation between the MDM and her beloved friends are both broad and deep, varying from discussion of spiritual truths and insights, career and personal goals, which contestants we like and dislike on Masterchef, literary works, whether or not we should eat another row of chocolate, etcetera.

To her dismay, through these conversations the MDM discovered that several of her beloved friends have endured dreadful dates with potential suitors over recent months. Others have been left in a state of sheer confusion, unsure as to where the potential suitor stands in his affection for her (if any). Which leads the MDM to ask, is there anything more tormenting than trying to ascertain the fragile boundary between friendship and romance? Well, yes, there probably is, but we can all agree that negotiating the level of just how much he’s “into you” is innately torturous at times, bringing bouts of nausea and acute anxiety.

Just as torturous, are the aforementioned dreadful dates that leave a maiden thinking that she would have much preferred to have spent an hour banging her head against a brick wall rather than have had coffee with a man who clearly forgot to shower that morning. Yes, dear readers, this actually happens and attractive, intelligent women are forced to endure it.

Also in the dreadful dates category are the ones where the conversation is stilted and quite frankly, boring.

A word to the potential suitors:

The MDM is about to let you in on a secret that could change your dating career for the better… If you ask a girl out for coffee, dinner or any other form of date-like activity, it would greatly assist your chances of a second date if you TALK. To her. With her. About virtually anything. Just pick a topic and try it out. And have a few up your sleeve. Literally, if required. Indeed, the MDM’s pastor once told the church that during his courtship with his now-wife, he wrote a list of discussion topics before picking up the phone to call her. Clearly, a brilliant ploy.

There are of course taboo topics for a first date: your ex-girlfriend and how she broke your heart is generally best avoided. As is how many hours you spend playing Playstation or X-Box.

Also on the taboo list is any reference to God speaking to you about how you and the maiden are “meant to be together”. Just keep that one in the bag for a while…  Please, p l e a s e, trust your good friend MDM.

And now a word to the maidens:

Whilst some of the dreadful dates make us cringe, we can’t be too critical of these potential suitors. For many of them, actually asking out a maiden on a date is an enormous hurdle and one that causes much angst on their part. Indeed, if you do then say yes, and they sit opposite you looking like a stunned mullet, it is probably because they are in awe of your beauty, wit and intellect!

 

The Date With The Swedish Backpacker.

28 May

Waiting to board their flight home from the big smoke, the MDM was not surprised when she turned around to find her mother engaged in deep discussion with a complete stranger. Her lack of surprise has formed over many years of witnessing this type of behaviour which, in all honesty, is quite the opposite to which the MDM would generally exhibit. Indeed, the MDM, upon noticing the interaction, rolled her eyes and inwardly cringed at the prospect of being drawn into the conversation when all she wanted to do was board the already-delayed flight.

Despite how she felt, the MDM chose instead to smile and engage in said conversation. In the subsequent moments, she discovered that the complete stranger was in fact a quite attractive, single, Swedish backpacker, travelling throughout Australia before completing his postgraduate study in nuclear physics. As you do. Boarding the plane, and genuinely suspecting that this would signify the end of the conversation, the MDM’s thoughts soon shifted from The Swedish Backpacker (TSB) to concentrating on falling asleep before the safety demonstration.

The aeroplane, however, had other ideas, and to cut a very long and arduous story short, after sitting on the tarmac for well over an hour, the MDM, her mother, TSB and all the remaining passengers had to disembark and re-board a different plane. (Evidently it’s much better to be safe, than take off with “technical difficulties”, albeit if one is delayed several hours.) During the re-boarding, TSB struck up conversation with the MDM and her mother once again. Again, cutting short a long story, the MDM and her mother ended up dropping TSB at a backpacker’s on their way home, taking a half an hour detour to do so.

As one does in contemporary society, TSB was keen to befriend the MDM on a popular social networking site in order to “stay in touch”. The MDM agreed to this, and the following day was rather surprised to receive a message from TSB, insisting that he come to visit as he had left his hat in the MDM’s car. Once again, for brevity’s sake, the MDM shall henceforth skip some of the peripheral details that ensued throughout the week, with one exception: the MDM was left in no doubt as to TSB’s intentions after receiving another message which ended with the ubiquitous symbol:

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The bottom line is this: yesterday, the MDM and TSB spent the day together. This definitely classifies as a date, albeit an unsuccessful one. Despite TSB being quite attractive, clearly displaying an intriguing intellect, and having that inherent desirable quality that arises from simply being foreign, the MDM soon discovered a lack of connection and chemistry on many other levels. In addition, to be frank, the maturity level of TSB did not quite match that of the MDM.

But, dear readers, please do not feel sorry for the MDM, nor pity her. She thoroughly enjoyed the day, and notwithstanding her initial reaction to TSB at the airport, very much enjoyed getting to know him. Indeed, although this date did not quite work out, the MDM has decided that she might choose her mother as a travelling companion more often…

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